Things No One Ever Tells You - Vol. 1

As I approach the end of my second decade and am well on my way to my quarter life crisis (see especially definition #2 "you feel lost and confused 23.5 hours of the day"), I figure it is my duty as a seasoned "adult" to pass on some of the wisdom I have acquired from my galavanting.


#1 Thing No One Ever Tells You: Being poor in a fun city is just as shitty as being poor in a boring city. So poor that if walking the 3 miles there and 3 miles back in the rain saves me the $4 dollars for public transit, I'll do it. So poor that if eating a breakfast souffle three hours past its expiration date means not having to pay for lunch that day, I'll do it. So poor that if stealing from The Salvation Army because it doesn't even disturb my moral compass anymore will get me a new polo for work, I'll do it. So poor that if taking the industrial sized toilet paper from work that won't even fit on a standard sized roll so we have to keep it on the back of the toilet means not having to buy toilet paper, I'll do it. So poor that no, man, I really honestly can't spare any change.


Bear in mind, these are not complaints. I know these circumstances were chosen, they are not out of real necessity. It's not that I couldn't have help if I wanted it, especially if I needed it. I do not thrash about in the depths of the truly desolate. I do not know what it means to go hungry a few days before every pay day. I do not know what it means to be sincerely grateful for that 25 cent raise. I do not know what it means to really have no roof under which to sleep. But I have seen glimpses of all of these. And I do finally understand how these conditions manifest themselves and how adults find themselves in lifestyles like these, where every move forward just puts you two steps back. It's by doing what we are doing for too long and expecting different results. Expecting it, expecting something, to actually pay off in the end. Rookie mistake. Hard times are getting the best of us, and you just can't get ahead in this race wearing thrift store shoes.